Expressing Happiness

What are the sources of happiness? Something that brings a smile on oneself, something that makes one proud, some big great news, some surprise, and so on. Even getting up in the morning to see new fresh sunlight in good health (so that the day can be enjoyed) makes one happy; on the contrary the moment someone is dying might make that person happy coz he would then be free from the burden of living and getting some form of stability. Afterall, the only thing that is certain for each and every being on this planet is death. Anyways, coming back to the main topic of Happiness. There are certain big moments that make one happy and also certain small ones, like getting an experiment successful, or in my case, I even feel very happy after peeling an orange when it turns out to be deliciously sweet and juicy. Now comes, what to do after getting the feeling of happiness ?

Some days back, I had a conversation with a friend:
FRIEND : Shekhar, your wedding date has been decided; when are you throwing a party.
ME : I will throw a party after I get married.
FRIEND : Why? Aren’t you happy that you are getting married…coz if you are you should throw a party.

This question made me wonder about the proper way to express/share happiness. I usually gift myself with something whenever I achieve something; something like passing an exam, or getting done with some work. I am happy when I achieve something. Can this act of gifting myself be classified as expressing happiness? I don’t know ! It looks more like rewarding myself for my achievements. So if taking friends out for dinner, from your pocket, signifies expressing happiness then maybe I don’t do it much. And so never did my friend do it. But that doesn’t mean that I was never happy, neither is it possible that she was never happy. So can it imply that we both never expressed our happiness ? I mean, can spending money on friends be considered as the proper channel to express happiness ? Or in a way, it can act as the means to get over your happiness, when you see your next credit card statement.

The Sinners

In Allahabad, there’s a holy place called Sangam which marks the confluence of the rivers Ganga, Yamuna and Saraswati. It is said that after a dip inside this holy water, one can cleanse his / her sins. This suggests that more ardent a believer would be of this way of self cleansing, the more sinful he must be. So where do you find most of the sinners ? Yaa, they would be swarming this holy place from time to time. But what about those who dip themselves around 2-3 times everyday in this water ? How much sinful would they be ? Yes, I am talking about the sadhus living there. Isn’t it an irony then that people from far and beyond trust these sadhus, consider them to be the purest of all, and approach them for prayers for a good life ahead or to get over some evil force, when these sadhus themselves keep getting over their sins by taking “ganga-snaan”. Maybe they are guilty conscious after prayer session in which they fool some money out of people coming over to them. Well, it is just a MAYBE ………. Only they know what sins they keep cleansing every now and then.

DENIAL

Denial is a defense mechanism postulated by Sigmund Freud, in which a person is faced with a fact that is too uncomfortable to accept and rejects it instead, insisting that it is not true despite what may be overwhelming evidence. I deny that I am NOT the best. It makes me happy. I feel whatever I do is perfect and the best. Wow! what a great feeling. I feel content. Living in the river of denial is a hard cold swim, but it’s a lot more safe and makes one feel satisfied with life.

I deny that I hurt someone. I deny that I have not been what I should be. I deny that what I said might have made the second person get watery eyes. I deny that I could have done better. Well, why am I doing this ? Because I don’t know where I get wrong.

It is well known that it’s impossible to attain perfection. Another fact, which I never read anywhere, but I believe is that it can’t be attained by anyone by himself. A second person IS mandatory for pointing out the deficiencies of perfection. And this is where the conundrum starts. For one person what defines perfection may not be the same as the other person. So who to consider as the appropriate second person to help in achieving perfection. Maybe parents, maybe love, maybe significant half, maybe friend; but then if perfection is attained in terms of one of these, it might not be in terms of the second one. Another facet is that the second person might not be able to come forward with his/her views thinking it might hurt.

Hence, the best road to follow is to denial of what others say. Be confident, n perfect for self. It is self esteem that matters at the end of the day.

My blogging quiescence

It’s been long that I have heard myself; almost 10 months. Many things happened in the meantime. I won’t say that they kept me so busy that there was no question of taking out few minutes to talk with myself on this blog. But I didn’t, and I am feeling sorry for that. Hope I don’t repeat.

Friendship Day

So today is friendship day. A friend of mine shouted at the top of her voice today morning for not wishing her Happy Friendship Day early enough; another one didn’t like to be wished as she feels that coz we celebrate friendship everyday, why to depict that we celebrate it only on a specific day.

Now what to do??

Friends and friendship has been valued since the beginning of the civilized world. The United States Congress, in 1935, proclaimed first Sunday of August as the National Friendship Day. Since then, celebration of National Friendship Day became an annual event. The noble idea of honoring the beautiful relationship of friendship caught on with the people and soon Friendship Day became a hugely popular festival. In 1997, the United Nations named Winnie – the Pooh as the world’s Ambassador of Friendship.

Enough of history. Coming back to the opinions of two of my closest friends.
Well, I accept that, in consensus with the whole world, one should have keep in his/her mind that today is friendship day that so wish his/her friends as soon as the day starts to show that their friendship is cherished and that they are missed/remembered/thought of always no matter they are far or near.
But do I need to do the above mentioned if I do it everyday? Will it show that everyday spent is a casual/normal one and that friendship day is the special day, the only day when I cherish my friendship, because U.S. congress has set this day to do so?

Why make things complicated by using big words like cherish, admire, appreciate,etc. Let’s keep things simple. It is not that these big words have a role on this special day, they are involved on daily basis in friendship, otherwise the relation won’t be called friends.
Let this first Sunday of august, be an excuse to party together with friends; he excuse that it is called friendship day.
That excuse can be used by friends living with their parents or husband/wife to go for late night party with friends;
an excuse to make someone (like my roommate) drunk;
an excuse to keep everyone awake for the whole night;
an excuse to call someone to start conversation and then ask for gossips;
an excuse to open your telephone directory to call ur old school friends to ask howz their recent affair or marriage going on;
an excuse to keep the girls happy as they are so much into remembering the dates;
an excuse used to make new friends and then love coz according to king Khan “har pyar ki shuruaat dosti se hoti hai”;
an excuse by gals to ask for gifts .

An excuse to spread love and happiness.

In my case, it can be used as an excuse to say that “I am glad to have great friends”, otherwise my friends would have said- “kya ho gaya tereko? kuchh chahiye kya?”

Universal Laws

Law of Probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don’t know what you are talking about.

FAITH

I have faith in God that he will help me find a job soon.

I have faith that my  sweetheart will never let me down.

What is faith??

Faith implies confidence or trust in a person or thing. It is a belief people lean on in times of despair to keep going. People have faith in others if they believe with closed eyes that the other person won’t let any trouble come near. But what is it that qualifies a person to be faithful? Truly speaking, faith is a belief in something for which we have no evidence. If evidence is present, then it becomes a fact.

So in present day world, how can anyone decide on something without any proof / guarantee /evidence. Whom to rely upon? The answer is self. Faith means belief in myself. One can honestly judge oneself only and no one else. Have faith in self, be faithful to self, n be content with ur life.

HOPE; Pls don’t Hope !

Hope seems to be just an illusion, an escape mechanism,the way to deceive oneself till the moment of destruction comes finally. I suppose, we wud be more sane without hope. So, do I mean to imply that we should not hope for anything, anytime? Well, yes. This would make life so much simpler.
‘Expectations’, the closest brother of ‘hope’ is the root cause of so much misery. Almost 90% of relationships end up badly because of expectations. If the two in a relationship don’t expect anything from each other, and instead just keep on giving whatever they can or want to (e.g. love, care, time, affection, respect, gifts), they will be leading what can be interpreted as unconditional relationship.
Anyways, coming back to the topic of hope. Nothing happens on its own (not considering the happenings d/t to natural forces like pleasant weather, flood, etc). Everything has a root of human action. Then how can something happen without doing anything for it by just hoping that it will happen. It is a common saying – “Don’t lose hope and things will be fine”. And time is a great medicine in many instances. But here also it is not that you are doing nothing. You analyze the situation and see that nothing can be done, and then you WAIT. Wait so that the time comes when you act .

I got the power !

Have you ever seen an elephant at a circus or in Jaipur at places where you get them for a ride? They are tied with a rope to some tree or a lamp-post or something like that. Amazingly, they never try to break away that rope and run. I once asked the guy incharge of that elephant as to why does this elephant not run away. He replied that when the elephants are very young and quite small, they are tied with the same rope, which is strong enough to have a hold on the baby elephants. They are continued to be tied with that rope such that even when they get big and strong, they are conditioned such that they believe that they can’t break that rope and be free. So because they believe they couldn’t, they are stuck where they are always.
Like the elephants, how many of us go through life hanging onto a belief that we can’t do something, simply because we failed at it once or twice before?
This also  implicates and proves that brain is much stronger than one’s physical strength. So be strong and confident and then you will realize that impossible, if broken is I M POSSIBLE.

Andar ki awaaz

Yesterday I was on a drive with my friends to a mall nearby, when it suddenly came to my mind that I should go to the temple. I have no idea why and from where did that come. Was it to show to my friend that I am a regular visitor of the temples and that I am a good boy doing daily prayers and things like that??

But I just drove to that place. When I reached there, it struck that what I am doing. I used to say that we should not be pray infront of some human creation or consider it as GOD, the creator and regulator of the world. Instead I used to say that it is everywhere, all around and in the sky…if u say something with faith in your mind, it is heard. Then why did I change my direction?

It was sunday and the temple was highly crowded. Then I found that lunch is offered on sundays in the temple. I said my prayers, and that was a quick one as usual. While coming out, when I was infront of the table where they were giving the plates for lunch, I moved away. I thought it will look as if I came to the temple to have free lunch.

But the truth is, I still don’t know why I detoured 9 miles off my route, just for going in for 5minutes maximum, for the thing which I never believed in. Now I know what people mean when they say they did something coz “andar se awaaz aayi / dil ne kaha “.